This question has been difficult for me to answer, not because things in my life haven’t come to an end but I see it as more of a “new chapter” sort of thing. So it’s really made me think about what caused said new chapters in my life. Not all these moments were sprung by negatives or even conclusions so it’s hard to evaluate what would go where in this book of life, you know?
I suppose one large moment was the end of high school and the beginning of college. It seems pretty cliche, the whole “becoming an adult” and “venturing off into the world” thing; but for me, it was more of an escape to start a new and better life for myself.
I’ve mentioned before that I was bullied throughout my years in school. I grew up with nearly the same people from first grade until high school graduation. Private schools were limited but that’s where my parents chose to put me; so you essentially grew up with more-or-less the same group of people. Which isn’t too terrible for most; but when you are bullied you can never escape those people. Couldn’t I just stick to another part of the school? Hang with different people? To give you a better understanding of how small the school was, my graduating class was 42. Yes, I types that correctly: 42. You can’t run when your numbers are that small.
And even out of school, my home-life left more to be desired. It’s not something I try to bring up but I was incredibly depressed growing up. I was too different from most people to make close friends; though I deeply treasured those that were. Not just my hobbies were different, but my clothing choices, my thought process, my everything- or so it seemed. It was your typical white Christian community and that isn’t me.
When I graduated, I was one of two people who left the area- everyone else went to one of the four more local schools. I moved to San Francisco not knowing anyone or anything but I knew it was right. I knew it was a free city with more openminded thinkers and people who acceptable you from all walks of life. I think the end of my predominantly white Christian schooling was the start of me finally being OK with who I am; that new chapter of the Steff you all know (and hopefully!) love!
So while that graduation and move to NorCal, ended that portion of my life, it will forever shape who I am today. In an odd way, I’m happy those things happened. I mean, of course it wasn’t fun going through that decade of my life but I’m happy with myself as a person and I don’t think I could feel that way unless I knew how much I hated myself at one point in my life.
Again, I find it hard to pick favorites and my first is definitely not my favorite! lol But my first costume (which I don’t even have photos of) was Mimiru from .hack//SIGN. I was so proud of that costume. My mom and i both worked on it and let me tell you, that was not a beginner costume! Her top is armor and she has armor side panels for her skirt! You know how we made the armor? It was stuffed!
Let me repeat that.
The armor for my costume was stuffed. Like a pillow! PILLOW ARMOR! How dumb is that?! But, it worked and we were proud of the results and that’s all that mattered. I had a foam sword that was way too small to be even close to accurate but I was stoked to have a sword regardless. I didn’t even have a wig! HA! Whatever! I liked it! And without that first costume I wouldn’t be where I am today; so I was forever embrace my shitty stuffed armor and tiny sword.
I would say don’t be afraid of not being perfect. There will always be something inaccurate about your costume. You may not realize it right when you finish the costume, but a year later you’ll say, “Man, I did this totally wrong!” or “This definitely could have been better.” And there’s nothing wrong with that! That’s called getting better. You can only hope to do the best you can right at this moment. You have no idea how your skills will pan out in a year or two from now, so don’t bother thinking about. Know that you did your best and you should feel proud that you made something fictional and turned it into a reality. That’s amazing! How many people can say they’ve done something like that?
So never be disappointed in your work. Don’t try to compare yourself to other people. Your’s isn’t bad or inadequate, just different. It’s uniquely you and you should be proud.
MOTHER HUMPIN SPACE CAMP BITCHES!
But seriously, I loved space camp. I went when i was in 6th grade and it blew my mind. I have always been very interested in space; in fact, growing up I originally wanted to be an astronomer until I learned about all the math you needed to learn. Fuck math. But space always seemed so amazing to me. The fact that we are just a tiny speck amongst the beauty of the universe has always fascinated me.
I remember viewing Saturn through one of their high powered telescopes. It was mostly blobby but the fact that I could see Saturn way out there in space just made my jaw drop. It still does, in fact! I don’t think I’ll ever forget that moment. It’s just a very different experience to see something with your own eyes versus something out of a book or online.
Hmmm That’s hard because I have a lot of difficulties picking favorites. So to just go with one of the movies I really really enjoy…
I first watched the movie Clue when I was fairly young age. I loved playing the board game; so when I was browsing Blockbusters with my mom and saw it sitting there, I really wanted to watch it. I watched it and remembered trying to figure out who had done it, as if i was actually playing the game along with the actors. I really enjoyed it upon first watching it but it wasn’t until I was a little older and could understand the humor did i really start to appreciate the film. It’s pretty corny but every time i watched it, I would discover something new or make a new connection. The movie itself almost became a game to me as I would discover new jokes and understand more references.
So I grew up with that movie, watching it over and over again. And now I own it on DVD and try to convince people to watch it with me every chance I get. haha
LOL How did I know this would be the first one asked?
It was a warm night and I looked longingly into Sebastian Stan’s eyes and we..
jk I actually haven’t had sex. Yup! Here I am, the 26-year-old virgin and totally ok with it. I’m asexual; so sex just doesn’t interest me. In fact, naked people freak me out as well as bodily fluids. So I imagine the first time it happens, it won’t be romantic at all and I’ll mostly be hoping it will be over sooner than later. I realize how terrible that sounds but it’s just not for me.
It would be great to feel that sort of connection with someone but I just don’t see it happening. For me, the best feeling when I’m with the person I love is just being with them, talking and laughing.